Better to love whether you win or lose or die

Talking in my lab class today with my lab partner I shared about my oldest niece and the close relationship I have with her - due in part to the fact that her father died shortly after she was born and she spent some of her early years living near me (or even sharing a bedroom with me.)
The response, which is so natural, was that my luck isn't very good. In a way it's totally true. My eldest sister lost her first (and always beloved) husband Joey, and my twin sister lost her daughter (and always cherished) Abbigayle. Death is awful. It hurts.

But I was thinking about things I do have.
Two brothers I enjoy.
Two sisters that are supportive.
Parents that are still married to one another and like me. A lot.
Nephews that number four.
Nieces that number eight.
Two brother-in-laws that care about my sisters.
A sister-in-law that is absolutely wonderful.

One of my favorite bands has a line in it that goes "better to love whether you win or lose or die."
And I believe that. One day my body will return to the ground like Joey and Abbigayle's did - and it's better for me to love.

Angry People

On my way to the beach to relax between class and work

(usually it's homework hour but NOT today!)

I stopped for four people crossing the road.

It was the right thing to do.

I looked in my rear view mirror in time to see the guy

behind me pitch a temper fit.

He threw his hands up in the air and got his face red yelling at me

(and the pedestrians?)

I thought it was ridiculous.

 

Why use up energy to get mad like that?

Who does that?! It's just such a waste.

As I continued driving I saw him speed past a line of cars

and swerve to get ahead... For what?

 

In the end when we parted paths he was one whole car ahead of me.

He turned and faded from view and I thought of the times in my life

when there have been things that I cannot control and I lose it.

Someone lets me down, slows me down, brings me down,

so I get angry, throw a fit, worry and fret, for what?!

It's never fixed the problem yet.

 

I want to be the sort of person who loves people.

Who is gracious to people.

And I'm not yet. But may that day draw ever closer!

I wait and I hope.

Love Wins

This week - my Spring Break Week - has been full.

Filled up with deep conversation.

And connection.

I'm reminded of something.

Love Wins.

My love book shelf. Because I forget.